The domestication of humans by cats was a succinct affair, preserved in the transcript of the conversation between some cats in a suburb of Mesopotamia and the first human to be domesticated by them. As follows:
CAT: Hey, Flatface.
HUMAN: Who, me?
CAT: Yeah, you, Flatface.
HUMAN: Yes?
CAT: We’re moving in.
HUMAN: What do you mean? You can’t just –
CAT: Shut up, Flatface. C’mon lads, it’s all clear.
HUMAN: But-
CAT: Where’s the food, Flatface?
HUMAN: Over there.